Father's Day

Wednesday, December 5th, is Father's Day in Thailand and also the King's birthday.  I had to do a Father's Day craft with my kids so they would have something to give their dad's on Father's Day.  I found this really cute card online and so for the past few weeks I have been making these with all my elementary classes.  I taught them how to fold the origami shirts, then they wrote notes inside to their dads and decorated the shirts.  We also drew ties, decorated them, cut them out and glued them on to the shirts.  Here are some examples of the shirts my students made :)

Wednesday we got the day off of school, but on Tuesday we had a Father's Day ceremony.  We all gathered in the cafeteria where there were speeches made by the administration, a dad, and some students, a Thai dance, and some music.  Afterwords, the fathers of the elementary students went with their children and spent an hour in their classroom.  It was a nice event :)

A Christmas-y GES!

So as I mentioned in my last post, the day after Thanksgiving was a teacher workday so we all gathered and decorated GES.  There were a few different groups to be part of and at the end of a few hours, the school looked great!  One group hung the garland and bows around the cafeteria, which looks so good!

I was in charge of decorating the bulletin boards so I had planned out what each bulletin board would look like and got all the materials ready to be put up.  I thought they came out really nice (and I must give credit to all the teachers that put them up for me - they did a great job and made them even better than I had planned)!  I am especially proud of the nativity scene- I think it looks so great!

p.s.  It is a really strange experience to decorate for Christmas while sweating because it's 95 degrees!  Hard to believe it really is Christmas when it feels like July but I'm trying!

Mexican restaurant + pizza+ milkshake + massage + art room buffet = one of a kind Thanksgiving!

This Thanksgiving was definitely different than any other Thanksgiving I have ever experienced.  In fact, it was hard for me to even remember it was Thanksgiving (I was skyping a friend earlier that week and was puzzled at why she was going to her parents house on Thursday and Friday (why take those two days off and not just wait for the weekend).  Then it hit me - it's Thanksgiving!).  

Anyway, we had school on Thursday but in the evening I went with my two friends Lauren and Sarah to Que Pasa, a Mexican restaurant that has pretty much any kind of food you could want.  Even though they are a Mexican restaurant they make really good pizza!  So I got pizza and a milkshake to celebrate Thanksgiving.  My friends, being the wonderful elementary teachers that they are, even made and wore Thanksgiving attire - a pilgrim hat and an Indian headdress.  We definitely got some weird looks from the waitresses but it was fun.  Our school administrators/bosses also showed up at the restaurant and paid for our meal without telling us (we only found out when we tried to pay and the waitresses were laughing and telling us it was free!).  We felt really blessed and it made me want to be better about doing random acts of kindness - it certainly makes an impact and blesses others!

After dinner we went and got massages, which one of my friends back home said we should incorporate into Thanksgivings in America.  I agree - they are a great way to relax and they certainly make you thankful!  

On Friday there was a teacher workday, so no kids, but we still came to school to work.  We ended up decorating the school for Christmas (more on that in my next post).  After working during the day, all the teachers and their families gathered in my art room for a big Thanksgiving feast.  We each brought a dish to share and gathered around my tables and chairs to share a Thanksgiving meal together.  It was a really nice time of fellowship and yummy traditional Thanksgiving food.  Not quite the homey setting I'm used to but I tried to remove the paint and crayon smell as much as possible :)

Hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving as well :)

This Made My Day

Parent's Visit!

I am FINALLY! putting up some pictures from when my parents came to visit me!  I hope these photos and descriptions give you a glimpse of our time together :)

My parents arrived on a Sunday night, October 14.   I picked them up at the airport and we went to a hotel near my school for the night.  Monday and Tuesday were the last two days of my first semester and then I had two weeks off before my next semester would start.  

On Monday I only teach in the afternoon so in the morning my parents and I took a taxi to the school and I showed them around my school, my classroom, and my apartment and they watched me teach a couple classes.

On Tuesday, I have very full days of teaching so I sent my parents off on their own adventure.  They took a water taxi into Bangkok and went to see the reclining Buddha and some other temples and  Buddhist structures.  They met a woman who travels all the time and she hung out with them for day (she is the one my mom is talking to in the water taxi picture).  My parents got back in the afternoon and freshened up while I finished teaching.  I was pretty impressed at all they had done and how successful they had been traveling around Thailand on their second day here!  I have never been to the reclining Buddha and I had not been on the water taxi until they came, but they figured it out all on their own!

Tuesday night I took my parents to their first eat-on-the-side-of-the-road, hole-in-the-wall restaurant.  Down the soi (street) there are lots of "restaurants" and places to buy food just lined up on the side of the road. I took them to one I really like.  I think they enjoyed the unique experience and the food was pretty good!  I get my dinner there about once a week, although I usually just bring it home to eat, but thought they would like to have the full experience.

The last two pictures are my parents having their first tuk tuk experience the next day!

Wednesday was my first day of vacation!!  We took the water taxi into Bangkok.  Here are some pictures of our ride (my first water taxi experience!).

We got off the water taxi and went to the Grand Palace.  We had to rent skirts and pants before we could enter to cover our shorts.  We walked around and saw all the detailed, elaborate, and huge architecture.  We also went into a temple, saw the coronation room, and went into a museum that talked about textiles and clothes in Thailand, and had lots of the queens dresses on display.  It was a pretty hot day but it was nice to walk around and see the Grand Palace.  After that we took a taxi to one of the main roads in Bangkok where we had some really good pizza.  On the way home we took the BTS (sky train) so my parents could experience that... and back to our hotel room to crash.

Thursday was our day to leave for Koh Samui, the island we were going to for a week.  Our train didn't leave until the evening so we just took the day easy, did laundry, played games, and hung out at my apartment.  Around 6:30 we left for the train station.  We got to the train station and tried to figure out where our train would be coming so we could get right on.  Seeing as most people don't speak English, it was a challenge just to figure out where to wait for our train.  Finally we sat and waited, but the train was pretty late.  After a lot of waiting and stress trying to figure out what train to get on we were told to get on a train that had just come (and was on the other side of the tracks).  Since these trains only stop for a minute or two we quickly grabbed our luggage, raced to the other tracks, showed them our tickets to make sure we were getting on the right train, found our train car, and got on.  Whew!  The train started moving and we sat on our train beds still not even sure we were on the right train going in the right direction.  We soon found out we were on the right train and heading south so that was good.  So we slept on this train overnight and in the morning we got to our train stop.  We thought the train would drop us off right at the ferry, which would take us to the island.  When we got off the train we were quickly told to get on a bus that would take us to the ferry.  So we got on the bus, not even sure if we really believed that we needed to, but that's what everyone else was doing so we joined the herd.  We found ourselves on a two hour bus ride heading to the ferry.  We finally got to the ferry and got on.  The ferry ride was nice and we were able to take in our first sights of the Gulf of Thailand.  When we arrived at Koh Samui and hour and a half later we took a 40 minute taxi ride and a total of 18 hours later arrived at our hotel.  Whew!  What a trip!

The pictures below are us arriving at our resort.  It was drizzling so the hotel guy greeted us with umbrellas and juice and showed us our island bungalow, complete with freshly picked flowers on the bed.  That night we went to the restaurant at our resort, which was right on the ocean and really peaceful.  I got masaman (a creamy red curry soup) and my parents got cashew chicken and lasagna, which was all delicious.  We ate there most nights and since it's not a popular time to vacation we almost always had the place to ourselves.  We spent the next day just exploring the island a bit, walking down the beach near our resort, walking down the street to see what restaurants were near by, and ended up having lunch at a little cafe where we got pizza and milkshakes.  We also did some research about what we wanted to do while we were there and we booked two tours for later on in the week.

On Sunday we took a songthaew (where you are basically sitting in the back of a pick up truck) and we went to a beach further north that was supposed to be really nice.  We walked on the beach a bit, went swimming (I found a coconut in the water) and then it started to rain.  We found some shelter nearby so we sat in there watching the rain and eating goldfish.  Then we walked a bit more and decided to go back.  We soon discovered that it rains almost every day in Koh Samui around 1:00 pm (at least when we were there) so most of our beach days were cut a bit short, but it was still nice.

That night we went to an Italian restaurant called Olivio's near our resort, right on the ocean.  It was a beautiful setting with delicious food.  Definitely a good end to the day :)

Monday was our first day of adventure.  We had booked a tour for the day so right after breakfast they came and picked us up at our resort and took us to to a boat where we joined a group of about twenty other people.  It was a bit of a cloudy windy day and we weren't sure if the weather was going to hold up but it actually turned out to be a good day (cloudy but not too hot, which was nice!).  We took an hour and a half boat ride (a very windy and bumpy one at that!) to the Angthong National Marine park, which is a group of forty-some small rocky islands which are absolutely beautiful.  Our first stop was snorkeling!  We got on our snorkeling gear, got off the boat and looked into the water.  It was incredible!!  What I saw under the water was probably the coolest thing I had ever seen - like being in a tank at the aquarium.  Fish were swimming inches from my face, there was incredible coral, and I even saw some large Rainbow fish.  It was so cool!  (Oh, and in the last picture on the left, you can see the profile of a gorilla n the rock!)

After snorkeling we made our way to the Green Lagoon, which is supposedly in a famous movie.  It is an island with a big green lake in the middle.  We "hiked" (a.k.a. climbed up really steep narrow stairs) to the top of this island to get a good view of the lagoon.  Then we climbed down the other side of the island to see the lake up close.  It was definitely beautiful up there!

After the Green Lagoon we took the boat to a deserted island where we had a delicious lunch (how they had that nice of a lunch on a beach in the middle of nowhere was pretty impressive!).  So we sat on picnic tables on the island and had lunch with our fellow tour friends.  Then we went kayaking around another island, which was a huge rock formation.  As we were kayaking around the rock it started to get really windy and rain (yep, it was around 1:00!) so kayaking became pretty intense!  But we made it back and the weather cleared up.  We walked down the beach, collected coral and shells and went for a bit of a swim.  After that we took the boat an hour and a half back to Koh Samui (and the weather got really bad again and we rode through pouring down rain, bouncing all the way back!).  Kind of crazy!

We got off the boat and they drove us to the last part of the tour - elephant riding!!!  I have always wanted to ride an elephant, so I was excited.  My parents and I all got on an elephant, with a guy sitting on the elephants head directing it and we rode the elephant around dirt paths.  It was a little sad because the area was really poor and run down and the elephants looked a little sickly, but it was still a cool experience.  While we were riding, the man on the elephant with us made us jewelry out of palm leaves - my mom got a ring, I got a bracelet and my dad got a necklace - they were all really neat!  After the elephant ride there was an elephant show where the elephant did different tricks, and that was really neat too.  After that we got to see the elephant up close and pet it.  The last picture is my parents and I riding the elephant :)

Tuesday we had a relaxing day where we went to Lamai beach further south.  It was a really nice beach and we went swimming and laid on the sand.  Soon it started to rain so we found a nice restaurant on the beach and ate lunch.  Later we went back to our resort and played games and just relaxed.

Wednesday we also had a relaxing day.  It rained most of the day so we just played games and relaxed at our resort.  Our big adventure of the day was going out for lunch.  We went to a hotel located on the top of a mountain, overlooking the water - it was a really neat view.  I got a pineapple fried rice dish that came in half a pineapple - pretty cool!  And I found a really cool chair :)

Thursday was our last full day in Koh Samui.  We had booked another tour so after breakfast we got picked up in a jeep and went to the southern end of the island.  Our tour guide (who was a little wild) had us sit on the top of the jeep as he drove up part of a mountain, which was kind of cool, kind of scary, since there was nothing really holding you on!  But we made it to a place where we went zip lining!  We zip lined through the jungle, had to climb up a bridge and then zip line some more.  My dad even went upside down!  It was really fun!  

After zip lining our tour guide took us to a beautiful waterfall.  Then we rode some water slides that were near the waterfall and then we had a delicious Thai lunch.  After that we were taken to another beautiful waterfall.  It was only a half day tour and not quite as exciting as we were hoping but it was still fun and nice to see more of the island and see the waterfalls.  It was actually the most beautiful day we had had there (no rain!) so we were glad to be back early so we could have a little more beach time before having to leave.

So after our jungle tour we came back to our resort and spent some time on the beach, swimming in the ocean, playing games and swimming in the pool at our resort, which we hadn't done yet.  It was a really nice day and really relaxing.  

Friday morning we were scheduled to leave Koh Samui (we were supposed to leave on Thursday, taking the taxi, ferry, bus, and train all the way back to Bangkok but it was just too much so we opted to take a one hour plane ride the next day!).  We got on our plane and flew back to Bangkok (and saw some really cool views out the window)!  We went back to the hotel we were staying at before near my school.  The last four pictures are views from our hotel room (and a sign welcoming us!).

Friday afternoon I took my parents to the park that I had explored earlier (and shared in an earlier post).  We walked through the parks and then got bikes and rode them around.  We didn't happen to see the water monitor lizard, but we had fun anyway.  And we got some ice cream :)

Saturday was our last day together.  I took them to JJ's market so they could experience a large Thailand market and get some souvenirs for friends (and get mango popsicles (see last picture)).  After that we came back to my apartment, hung out, played games and then left for the airport.

It was so great to have my parents here, to show them around my school and apartment, and to vacation with them.  It was really hard to say goodbye and have them leave but I am grateful for the time that we had together and that they got a taste of my life here and can picture where I am.  Hope you enjoyed reading about and seeing pictures of our time together :)

Adventuring on a Sunday Afternoon

Today I decided to finally go check out a park I've been wanting to explore.  I did a little research and realized that it's actually 3 parks combined and they are all a little different.  I got a taxi to Chatuchak park, which is the park I first discovered, making me want to come back and explore more.  After walking through this beautiful park (which reminds me so much of the parks in Boston) I ran into a Canadian and asked him where I could rent a bike (I heard you could do this for a dollar and thought that would be a good way to explore this large park).  He taught me how to say "rent bike"  (sounds like 'chow chak-ra-yan') and pointed me to another park and said the bike rentals were on the other side of that park.  So I entered the second park and walked through that.

It was a beautiful, well-kept park full of beautiful flowers, gardens, bridges and water.  I finally ended up at a building and asked a lady if I could rent a bike.  She explained that I was in the Queen's Park where you could not rent a bike.  But she was very nice, gave me a map, and explained where I wanted to go.  I went where she said (after much confusion and meeting a Thai man to help me understand where I was on the map) and ended up in a grove of banana trees.  It was pretty cool to see so many banana trees up close, buuuut it didn't have bikes.  So I walked a bit more and ended up where I was before.  So I asked someone else for help and he pointed me in another direction.  I finally figured out a few landmarks on the map and somehow discovered that the third park was the one where you could rent bikes and that I had actually passed the entrance to that park at least two times as I circled around the Queen's park.  Finally I made it to the third park, asked where I could rent bikes and was directed to the other end of the park.  After walking almost two hours I finally found the bike rentals!  So I rented a bike and rode around that park for a while.  Then I stopped and got some ice cream and ate it by a lake.  It was a beautiful afternoon and there was a nice cool breeze (like the ones you feel before a storm coming) and the smell of fresh cut grass was wafting through the air.

After a three hour adventure, lots of exercise and picture taking I was ready to go home.  I returned my bike,  bought a few fried bananas and eventually found a taxi home.  It was a wonderful afternoon, great to get some fresh air and explore a new part of Thailand.  I got to see some beautiful flowers, banana trees, a HUGE water monitor lizard (soooo cool!!!... and yes, I had to look up what kind of reptile this was... didn't even know they existed!) and soak up some Thailand sun.  It was fun to be a little adventurous and independent.  It's still funny to think of myself getting taxi's around Thailand, exploring parks, and riding bikes with the locals on a beautiful Sunday afternoon.  Who would have guessed?

Fall Party!

With many of the female teachers here being Pinterest fans (me included), we've been seeing tons of recipe's posted for fall food.  Pumpkin this, apple that... it was just too much for us to sit around and not partake in.  Even though it still feels like summer weather, we decided we needed to turn up the AC, put on some warm comfy clothes and get together to eat scrumptious fall foods and celebrate this new season (even if the air isn't cool and crisp and the leaves outside aren't red and orange).  As fall is my favorite season (and one I am missing very much right now) I thoroughly enjoyed this get together.  It was hosted in an apartment a few doors down and they did such a beautiful job making it look like fall - candles, red, orange and yellow leaves hanging, mini pumpkins, and many other decorations helped it to really feel like fall.  We had tons of pumpkin breads/muffins, my roommate and I brought apple crisp, there was a caramel apple bar (where you dipped your apple in caramel and then dipped it in bowls of chocolate chips, nuts, m&m's or whatever), popcorn, and there was wassail (like hot apple cider) and chai. Mmmm, so good!  We ate and talked and ended the night watching a fall-ish movie, Remember the Titans.  It was a wonderful night!

Today

Today I...
-slept in; still tired from the previous week (and fighting off sickness)
-walked to 7/11 to get juice; made toast with cinnamon sugar
-listened to a sermon online (thank you Pastor Jon :)
-read Jesus Calling, reminding me of God's peace
-played hymns - refreshing for my soul
-ate mama gai and Thai tea
-read about Hobbits in the prologue of The Lord of the Rings
-had lunch with P'Nee, the lady who makes my mama gai and Thai tea; sympathized with her and laughed
-talked to a Thai man who is an agricultural officer in Krabi
-took a nap
-baked chocolate espresso cookies while listening to music
-wrote to friends back home
-turned up the AC, got in my pj's, cuddled under a blanket on the couch, sipped chamomile tea with honey
and read

I'd call that a pretty good day :)

The Very Hungry Caterpillar

In my younger elementary classes we have been making painted papers like Eric Carle.  I showed them a video of Eric Carle making his papers and then we used different objects to decorate our own construction paper.  The second day I read The Very Hungry Caterpillar, then we cut four ovals out of the painted construction paper to make the body of our caterpillar.  Then we glued it on card stock  and added details and background with markers.  Didn't they come out so cute?

p.s. The boy in the first picture with the huge smile is one of my favorite students.  He is always so happy and thinks everything is so exciting and fun.  He is just adorable and I think he did a great job on his caterpillar!  Oh, and the first caterpillar is my example... I think it came out pretty cute :)

Terminal 21

On Monday it was the Queen's birthday so we didn't have school.  Instead, I did some lesson planning in the morning and then in the afternoon my friend Laura and I went into Bangkok to Terminal 21.  Terminal 21 is basically a really big mall but it is unique because each floor is decorated like a different country.  The lights, decorations, statues, and especially bathrooms each represent a specific country.  It's really fun to just walk around and see how each floor is uniquely decorated.  Here are some glimpses of my time there...

p.s.  On Monday I rode a tuk tuk, taxi, subway, and sky train all in one day!  Talk about public transportation!

Mary and Martha

I’ve also been thinking a lot about Mary and Martha.  Martha was so busy doing good things but it caused her to be anxious and upset.  Mary sat at Jesus’ feet and soaked up his presence.  Jesus said that Mary had chosen the better part. 

In the Bible study I attend we have been reading Philippians and in chapter 3 Paul says that all his accomplishments are rubbish.  What he really wants is to know God.  I can get so frantic trying to always do my best.  I want to please God and others and myself and fulfill all my high perfectionist requirements.  This, however, is not what God intended.  He doesn’t want me to be so busy doing good works that I am running around like a chicken with my head cut off.  There are enough people like that in the world.  God just wants me to sit at his feet, soak up his presence and be with him.  Isn’t the best thing to get to know Christ?

When I think about my friends, I don’t want them to be so busy doing things for me that I don’t get to spend quality time with them.  I just want to sit with them and get to know them, enjoying being in their presence.  And if I think about it, aren’t I most attracted to the Mary’s in my life – people who are calm and have the glow of God because they spend so much time in his presence?  I want to be a Mary that the students at GES can see as someone they can talk to because I’m not so busy.  I want to be someone who has the glow of God because I constantly sit in his presence. 

I never picture Jesus in a hurry.  He was never in a rush to do good things and meet everyone’s expectations.  In fact, most of his miracles were done on the way to places.  He had time to stop and visit with people, to eat dinner and stay at their house.  He had time to talk to people and I picture him being a fairly relaxed person without a lot on his schedule.  He allowed God to direct the events in his life rather than having his daily planner be so full there was no room for God to move him.  When you know really busy people, even if they are busy doing good things, they are not someone you are attracted to go and talk to.  In fact, I think that our good works don’t have as much impact as just being and building relationships do.  People who have time for me, to pour into me and show me God, those are people that have impacted me the most.  I want to do the same for the students here at GES.

God just wants us to sit in his presence.  He wants us to spend time with him, talk to him all the time, and share life with him.  He wants to be our constant companion, the first one we go to, the one we share everything with.  He wants us to sit at his feet, breathe, relax, let go of all our stress and anxiety and rest in his presence, soaking up his love and peace. 

Do You Trust Me?

In the past few days I have been thinking about how much I’ve grown in the last two months.  My perspective, the way I approach life, and my trust in God have all changed.  I was also thinking about college – how much I changed in college but even more, how much I’ve changed and grown since then.  It’s crazy to think how fast life can change.  Just 7 months ago I was graduating from college and had no idea where I was living or what I was going to do with my life.  I had no idea at that point that in 5 months I’d be on a plane to spend a year in Thailand.  As I looked back at my life the lyrics of one of my favorite songs came to mind.  “When the road starts to turn around each bend I’ve learned you are good, so good…”  (You Are Good, by Point of Grace).  So often my life has come to a bend in the road and I didn’t know what was around the corner.  But I have found that around each bend, in each turn, God has been so faithful, always providing my next step.

I am learning to trust in God like never before.  I won’t say it’s easy (because it’s not) and I won’t say it happens all at once (because it doesn’t).  It’s a process but one I am so glad I have started to go through.  It is hard here but I would rather be growing ever closer to God and knowing him more and trusting him more and having to rely on him because I have nothing else, than to live an easy life where I do not need God and do not have a close relationship with him.  Having to rely on him, constantly reaffirm my trust in him, and daily remind myself of his close presence are all things that I would never give up for an easier life that I could   manage on my own.

This morning I woke up feeling anxious about my weekend ahead.  In fact, I wake up most mornings anxious – anxious about my day ahead, what will happen, if I’ll be lonely, stressed, or okay.  But then a question popped into my mind only minutes after waking up.  “Do you trust me?”  I know that God was asking me this question.  Am I going to trust him today?  The next image that popped into my mind was Aladdin, standing on his magic carpet, his hand outstretched to Jasmine, asking if she trusted him enough to come and take a ride.  The analogy is somewhat silly but it is so true.  God is there, holding out his hand for me, and asking me if I trust him enough to take hold of his hand and fly with him through this day.  Do I trust him enough to get me through all the twists and turns life might throw at me?  Do I trust him to steer well and keep me upright?  Do I trust him to provide for all my needs and surprise me with random acts of love?  Do I trust him to get me through all the ups and downs, hold me tight through it all and get safely to the end?

I’ve been reading a new devotional that has triggered a lot of these thoughts – it’s called Jesus Calling by Sarah Young.  I read a sentence that honestly shocked me.  “I guarantee that you will always have problems in this life.”  In my head I knew this was true but my life did not reflect this knowledge.  I spend so much time and energy trying to make my circumstances perfect.  I try to minimize the problems in my life and make my life more perfect and smooth, with everything going just as it should be.  I suppose that is why this sentence shocked me so much.  I will always have problems - in fact they will probably get harder and more complicated as I get older.  My circumstances will never be perfect and my life will never be smooth.  The solution, I am learning, is to trust God in everything.  So often I base my life, emotions, everything, on my circumstances.  One wrong thing and I’m spiraling down.  The devotional continued, reminding me that while my circumstances may change, God does not.  Instead of grasping to steady myself on my ever-changing circumstances (similar to trying to steady yourself on a flying magic carpet) I need to cling to God, who is firm through it all.  If I focus on God and put all my trust in him, my emotions won’t have to change so drastically with every slight change of the wind.

Some days putting this into practice is harder than others.  Sometimes my day goes fine.  Other days I feel more anxious and I go through my day saying “I trust you.  I trust you.  I trust you.”

And when I put my trust in God, truly allowing him to be God of my life and letting go of the reins, I feel my anxiety melt away and a warm peace fill my soul.  I want more of that – more of that peace.  I hate waking up every morning feeling anxious (and I was reminded recently that this anxiety is not from God), but when I spend time with God, each day redeclaring my trust in him, I feel Him transforming me, changing the way I view the world, and making me more into who he wants me to be.

The world is often like a magic carpet ride.  There are ups and downs and nothing feels solid and all I want is to rest my feet on solid ground and feel secure.  But the world doesn’t offer that does it?  The world is full of problems and changing circumstances and twists and turns and we can’t see around the bend or even the next step forward.  But I am learning each day to trust in God and to know that he is holding onto my right hand, he cares about my every need and will provide for that need, and he will light just enough of my path so that I know where to put my next foot forward.  It is hard but it is keeping me close to him, it is making me squeeze his hand ever tighter and trust him to hold me up.  It is allowing me to feel his love and presence like I have never felt it before, to feel his peace at the most unlikely times and to daily take my anxiety, bring it to God, and respond, “I trust in you.  I trust you to order my day, to provide for all my needs, and to take care of me.  I trust you.”  And finally, it is allowing me to grab hold of his hand, step out on this crazy ride, not be afraid of what will come (for what can happen to me if I am with God?), and to join him in this adventure called life, trying to live it to the full.

I would also recommend the devotional “Jesus Calling” for anyone, especially if you are struggling.  Each devotional is short, but it is like Jesus is talking to you directly and the way that he speaks is so tender and loving.  It has reminded me of God’s tender loving heart and how much he truly does care for us and does not want us to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders.  He wants us to rest in his presence, be renewed by his love, and just abide with him every day.

Quotes from my devotionals that have triggered these thoughts:

“Keeping your eyes on Me is the same thing as trusting Me.  It is a free choice that you must make thousands of times daily.  The more you choose to trust Me, the easier it becomes.  Thought patterns of trust become etched into your brain. Relegate troubles to the periphery of your mind, so that I can be central in your thoughts.  Thus you focus on Me, entrusting your concerns into My care.”

“I want you to learn a new habit.  Try saying, “I trust You, Jesus” in response to whatever happens to you.  If there is time, think about who I AM in all My Power and Glory; ponder also the depth and breadth of My Love for you.”

“Trust me by relinquishing control into My hands.  Let go, and recognize that I am God.  This is My world: I made it and I control it.  Yours is a responsive part in the litany of Love.”

“It’s all right to be human” – whew!  What a relief!  (I struggle a lot with this - I am a perfectionist and want everything to be perfect - not only my circumstances but everything I do.  It's a good reminder that I am not God, I will never be perfect, and that that's okay!)

Cambodia

Last weekend (August 2-5) I had the privilege of going to Cambodia to visit Chris and Yuko Wilkins, and their boys Caleb and Corey.  I had Thursday and Friday off of school so I flew to Cambodia on Thursday and spent four days with them.  For those of you who don’t know, the Wilkins are the family that I lived with in Rochester this past spring.  They were in America on furlough and I was looking for a place to stay in Rochester by my school after I graduated.  It worked out that they were living in the missionary house that my church owns, which happens to be right across the street from the church and Roberts campus.  There was an extra bedroom so they let me stay with them from January to May.  In May I went home before coming to Thailand and in July they came back to Cambodia.  Anyway, we became like extended family to each other and it was so great to be able to see them after not having seen them for three months.  The flight to Cambodia is only an hour, so it was really convenient. 

It was so nice to get away for a few days, be with people I knew back in the US and to relax.  The boys were so excited to see me and show me around their house and my room (which they lovingly decorated with "Welcome Bekah" signs :)  On Friday we went to a resort where they had a nice swimming pool.  I swam with Corey and Caleb for a bit and we also had lunch there, played games and read.  It was so relaxing.  (And on the way there and back I got to ride in the back of the truck which was so fun.  I’ve always wanted to do that!).  Friday night we went over their neighbor’s house (they came with us to the resort and are also missionaries and really close friends with the Wilkins).  It was really nice to spend time with them too.  On Saturday we spent the morning driving around Cambodia in tuk tuk.  We went to some stores, the Independence monument, the market (where I got two fun T-shirts for $1.50 each), and a restaurant/café called Jars of Clay.  Jars of Clay is a restaurant run by Cambodian women who are saved from sex trafficking or would have gotten into sex trafficking if they didn’t have this other means of making money.  I had a delicious Greek salad there (salads don’t really exist in Thailand so it was nice to have some greens and feel healthy).  Saturday afternoon was really peaceful.  The boys were over a friends house and Chris was at a meeting so I laid on the couch and read for a couple hours while Yuko baked homemade oatmeal cookies.  It was so nice to be with a family, in a home, and relax.  It was also really nice to talk to Yuko about my experiences and how I was doing.  As a fellow missionary far from home she could relate and encourage me.

Sunday we went to one of the main Cambodian churches in Phnom Penh.  It was really neat to be able to see a local church and see some of the ministries that Chris and Yuko oversee.  Sunday afternoon we went home for lunch and games and headed to the airport, where we got some ice cream before I had to board the plane. 

It was really hard to say goodbye.  It had been such a wonderful weekend seeing the Wilkins again, relaxing, being in a home and with a family that I knew and was comfortable with, only to come back to my apartment where I sometimes feel lonely and overwhelmed.  But I am so thankful that they are so close and that I know I can visit them again and it is so easy and quick to get there.  It is so nice to have people I know so close, in the same time zone, and who love me and can encourage me along the way.

Students painting

Wai Kru Day

These are some snapshots from Wai Kru day.  Wai Kru is a day where students honor their teachers.  Wai-ing is what Thai people do to someone they respect.  They put their hands together and bow down to you.  Kru is the Thai word for teacher.  So Wai Kru basically means respect your teacher.  During the ceremony there were some speeches and then the teachers and administration were called up on stage.  Students were called up and they would come in front of you, kneel down, 'Wai' you while bowing, and then give you flowers.  As a teacher we had to put our hand on their shoulder and thank them or give them a blessing.  It is a cool tradition/holiday.  The flowers at the top are some pretty pink potted flowers (how's that for an alliteration) and the flower arraignment on the bottom is a typical Thai flower arraignment (bright flowers in a golden base and in the middle is a ring of candles and incense).  It was definitely a unique experience and nice to see that they still value respect.

Starbucks

Last Sunday after church I went for a run around a lake that is nearby.  Our church is located in a somewhat country-club like area for ex-pats.  There is a lake and quiet streets and sidewalks to run on (which you can't really find anywhere else in Thailand!).  After a run around the lake I met up with my friend Chrissy and we spent the afternoon in a highly air conditioned Starbucks (my first time getting Starbucks in Thailand).  It was so wonderful to have an "American" afternoon sipping a caramel macchiato and eating a mozzerella, tomato, and basil bagel sandwich.  I sat and read the Hobbit on my kindle while my friend planned lessons.  

p.s.  Starbucks is pretty much the same as in America... same products, similar prices, although they do have a green tea red bean frappe...  I'll have to try it sometime :)

JJ's Market

Last weekend I took my second trip to JJ's on a Saturday morning.  This is supposedly the biggest market in the world!  Walked around, bought some gifts for friends and family and a cool Thai T-shirt for myself.  It's fun to walk around and just see all the interesting things that you don't see anywhere else.
Pictures:
1. A store full of jewelry
2. Me eating grilled chicken on a stick and a sticky rice patty... a new favorite meal :)
3. My two friends Chrissy and Sarah drinking out of their coconuts.  I tried it but it was not what I expected... coconuts are not really milky... they are actually full of kind-of sweet water but it was nothing all that great.  But cool to say you drank out of a coconut!
4. Megan, Chrissy, Lauren, and Sarah eating their Thai tea popsicles... so good!
5. 6. 7. Some sights while walking through the market... so many people and so much to look at!
8. 9.  Eating mango sticky rice before we headed back.

Spiritual Lessons

... Warning!  This post is super long...

I think more than anything else, the thing that sticks out to me these past few weeks is how I’ve grown spiritually and been so aware of how God is working in my life.  Every day I am seeing more and more how applicable the gospel is in my life, and I am seeing Scripture relate to my life in a whole new way.  I feel like every Bible verse, every song, can relate to my life in a way that I’ve never felt before and I’m learning so much.  I don’t think I’ve ever felt closer to God, ever felt his love and presence more real, or ever had such unshakeable trust and faith in Him.

Here is a collection of thoughts and lessons I’ve been learning:

A few weeks ago I read a devotion that really hit home.  It was talking about fear and said that when we fear we are basically saying that God can’t be trusted.  Although I think fear is a natural reaction in humans, we don’t have to live in fear.  While reading this devotional I realized that I was living in fear and therefore not trusting God.  There are so many things for me to be afraid of… fear that I can’t do all the work I have to do, fear that I will be alone and won’t make friends, fear that I am not a good enough teacher, fear that I will lose relationships back home, etc.  But I know that God has brought me here and he is trustworthy.  If he has called me to be an art teacher here he will help me do all the work I need to do and be a good teacher.  And if he called me to this community he will provide for my need for friendships.  And if he has called me here for a year or more, I don’t need to worry about my future and future relationships… he will take care of that too when the time comes.  When I think about each fear I have and trust that God will provide for me in that area, I no longer need to be afraid.  I know that God is trustworthy and that he will always provide and take care of me.  He is enough.

There are days here that I feel like I am in the deep end, up to my chin in water and about to drown.  I feel overwhelmed by homesickness, loneliness, and the unfamiliar.  I miss people deeply, I don’t know how to handle some things in my classes, and I just want to curl up in ball and be held.  I feel like I have all I can do to stay above water and I can’t handle one more thing.  (Don’t worry, all days are not like this… only some).  On those days it is hard to see outside myself and to help others who may be close to drowning as well.  It is hard for me to sympathize with others and care about their needs because I am so consumed with my own basic needs – need for community, love, and belonging.  Relating to this image of drowning, I was recently reminded of when Peter walked on the water.  When he saw the wind coming he doubted, was afraid and began to sink.  But if he had kept his eyes on Jesus and trusted in him he would not have sunk.  Although there are many things to fear and I can feel like I am sinking, if I keep my eyes on Jesus and trust in him I can rise above those fears and keep moving forward closer to Jesus.

I’ve also been thinking about how I am a broken vessel.  I am not perfect and can’t do everything perfectly right and good.  But someone reminded me that it is because of our brokenness that people see Jesus.  When people are strong in their own strength no one can see through to what’s inside.  But when we are broken, broken vessels, people can see Christ in us through the cracks in our clay.  It is through our brokenness that others can see Christ working in and through us.  In the New Testament we do not see Christ in the ‘perfect’ Pharisees, we see him transform the tax collector, heal the blind, and love the orphan and widow.  It is not in our perfection and having it all together that Christ is seen, but it is when we admit we need him to help us become who he wants us to be.

I am learning to trust in God more than ever before.  I am learning that God is so trustworthy and faithful.  I am learning that the only place I could ever be content is in the will of God.  Although sometimes it is hard here, I know that I would not want to be anywhere else.  If I was somewhere easier but knew that God had not called me there I would be miserable.  As hard as some days may be, I would not trade them for anything because I am growing closer to God, having to rely on God, and there is nothing I would rather have than a deeper relationship with him.  I can rest and be content because I know I am where God wants me to be.

Sometimes I fear about my future… what will I do next year, will I still have friends at home or will we have lost touch, etc. but in a sermon I recently heard, the pastor said, “Trust God for your future; obey today.”  That was so good for me to hear.  I need to live one day at a time, obeying God and trusting him each day, and leave my future up to him.  He is already there, he already knows my path and will let me know when the time is right.  He will provide when the time comes.  In another Amy Carmichael devotional she talks about how we don’t live by electric lights that show us the whole road.  We live by lanterns that only give us enough light so that we can see our next step… not five steps ahead. 

Another thought I had, that was inspired by a devotional someone gave, was that at the Global English School we are one body made up of many parts.  All the teachers here are so different, so unique.  No two people on staff here are the same at all.  At first that was hard for me because I wanted to find someone like myself to be my best friend.  But I realized that we are all so different and that is a good thing.  We can still be friends even if we are different and we all have different gifts to bring to the table.  Sometimes I wish that I was an eye like my friend or an arm like someone else, but I have a specific part to play just like everyone else and we can’t all be the same.  Another cool thing about that is that because we are all different, we all show Christ in different ways.  The kids that come to our school get to see so many different aspects of Christ because we all show him in a different way.

Another devotional that someone gave related to the story of the feeding of the five thousand.  The disciples started out with a few fish and loaves of bread but it fed thousands.  Often I feel like I have so little to give.  Who am I to teach these kids art and show them Christ?  But God can take my meager offering, what little I have to give, and make it enough.  He can feed these kids with the little I can give them and make it enough even though I feel so inadequate!  What a relief!

I have given up wearing makeup to church.  Not because of some religious principle but because every time I go to church I end up crying during the songs, so rather than have mascara running down my face every week I just don’t put it on.  The first few weeks I was probably crying because I was homesick but recently I have cried because I am so amazed at God.  A few weeks ago we sang Holy, Holy, Holy at church and I wrote this down, “Today at church we sang Holy, Holy, Holy.  I love hymns – their depth and theology.  I like worship choruses too but those often are about God and a hymn is usually to God.  I get to be like the angels around God’s throne who are constantly singing Holy, Holy, Holy!  I closed my eyes and started crying as I listened to the congregation lift their voices in this song.  It was so beautiful to think about this congregation – a group of people God has called from all over the world to gather in Thailand and proclaim his holiness and love to the people around us.  Here was this group of people gathered together in the midst of Thai’s and Buddhism all lifting our voices in beautiful sound, praising God and declaring his holiness.  It was beautiful – it’s hard to even describe.”

The next week we sang In Christ Alone, and the words resonated with my spirit in a whole new way.  “In Christ alone, my hope is found.  He is my light, my strength, my song.  This cornerstone, this solid ground, firm through the fiercest drought and storm.  What heights of love, what depths of peace, when fears are stilled, when strivings cease.  My comforter, my all in all, here in the love of Christ I stand…”  These words have never been more true for me.  God has been my solid ground these past few weeks when nothing else is.  Everything around me has shifted and changed except for God who is the solid rock I stand on.  Even through this tumultuous storm he has held fast and firm.  He has shown me his love in new ways and the peace he has given me on my most anxious days is truly supernatural.  He has stilled my fears and calmed my useless striving.  He has comforted me over and over again when I felt alone and afraid and anxious and has helped me through this time in more ways than I could ever count.

I’ve also been thinking about our calling to be like Christ.  Often we think that means to take up our crosses and follow him and die to ourselves.  Recently I’ve been thinking about the incarnation.  Jesus left heaven (his home and place of comfort) to come to earth and die so that others may know God and live.  In a similar way (not that I am Christ or saying this to make myself sound righteous) but I also have left my haven and comfort of home and gone to live somewhere foreign to me to show others God so that they may live.  Jesus was representing God in the flesh and he calls each Christian to do the same – to be a physical representation of God.  I am not saying that everyone must move, but to remember that wherever God has called you to be, we are there to show others God.  We must be willing to give up our comfortable easy lives so that others may know God.

I’ve been learning that God’s will is not always easy.   I used to have the idea that if I was doing God’s will I would enjoy it (why would he call me to do something that is hard and I don’t like?  Doesn’t God want me to be happy?).  In another Amy Carmichael devotional she wrote on this topic and reminded me that Jesus did the will of God and it cost him blood – it cost him is life.  I’m sure dying on the cross was not enjoyable or easy, but painful and extremely difficult.  But it did so much good – it saved so many others.  Doing the will of God is not always easy and fun but we can have something better than cheap happiness.  We can have deep contentment knowing that we are where God has called us to be and he is using us for a greater good.  His grace is enough for our journey.

I have been reading The Hobbit since I got to Thailand and I have been enjoying it so much.  I read a little bit before I fall asleep at night and read it on the weekends to relax. I think I like it so much because I feel very much like Bilbo Baggins.  Bilbo was not really one for adventure.  He liked the comfort of his home (the Shire), sitting by the fire with a book and a cup of tea.  But Bilbo was sent on an adventure full of danger and dark forests and unknowns and throughout the book there are times when all he wishes is to be back in the Shire.  I am very much like Bilbo.  I am such a homebody.  I love to be home with my family, cuddled up on the couch under a blanket, a fire in the fire place, a book in my hand and a cup of tea nearby.  But I too have been sent on an adventure through dark forests and full of many unknowns.  There are times when I long to be back in my Shire.  But I am beginning to realize and accept that my Shire is not the North Shore or Rochester.  My Shire needs to be wherever God has called me to be.  My home can no longer be a physical location, although in each new place I go it is nice when I finally feel settled and ‘at home’.  But no matter what, my home needs to be in God.  He is my only constant and wherever he calls me must become my new Shire. 

I’ve also been reading through Deuteronomy and that has been so meaningful but I’ll save that for another post… this one is super long already J

Teaching

I’m really enjoying teaching and feel like I am finally into a routine and a rhythm.  The first week of teaching I basically just went over rules and materials they needed to bring in so I didn’t enjoy it that much.  The second week we organized the materials they brought in (which was a bit of a nightmare) and then got started on our first project.  Now (since I only see most of them once a week) they are into their first projects and starting to finish the first projects up.  It’s exciting to see them make things and get excited about the results.  My younger kids are especially cute.  They love art and all they want to do is paint… they think it is so cool.  Last week I showed my first graders how to use watercolors and they literally jumped up and down and squealed when they saw the color go from the paintbrush onto the paper.  It was adorable. 

I also had my first high school critique which went pretty well.  Although some kids didn’t participate as much as I would have liked I thought some of them enjoyed it, we made some great observations, and I think it gave them a better idea about how to look at artwork (and what to look for).  I really like all the age groups I teach and enjoy different things about each grade.  The younger kids are so cute and have an excitement and joy about all things in life.  The middle school and high schoolers don’t always have the best attitude or work ethic but some of them are already really talented, we can have real conversations, I can teach them more advanced art techniques, and they clean up their own mess (something I need to work on with the younger kids!).  Anyway, school is going really well and I enjoy teaching and interacting with the students.

This past week a few younger girls stopped by after school while I was sweeping.  They asked if they could come in and I said “Sure!”  They wanted to help me clean so I gave them the broom and they swept for me.  They really wanted to mop too but I didn’t have time to stay and do that.  They came the next day again and mopped for me (basically dragging the mop around behind them as they walked around the room but it worked!) and I gave them peanut butter crackers as a reward, which they thought was the greatest thing ever.  They also drew pictures on my white board for me, which was so cute.  I had some older girls come in to work on their art projects or just free draw/paint.  It is exciting to have kids wanting to hang out after school in my classroom and I pray that I can build relationships with them and show them Christ through our interactions.

So overall teaching is going really well.  I enjoy creating lessons that I think they will enjoy as well as teach them a new material, element of art, technique, or artist.  I’m also enjoying it a lot more since I can finally call a few students by their name and am getting to know them more personally each week.  It takes time since I have 250 students and I only see most of them once a week but it’s coming, and it’s fun to get to know them and have them excited about art.